Moving On

How many times have we bid farewell to people? Life puts us through these moments in various ways; be it graduating from school, changing houses, breaking up with your girl (or guy as the case maybe) and for most part of adult life changing jobs.

The feelings depending on whether you are the “bidder” or the “bidee” for lack of a better term vary and actually present a rainbow of emotions.

This piece is about one such emotion more so from the perspective of the bidders or the folks who are saying good byes to someone who has decided to leave them.

This is always the elephant in the room that no one looks at, wants to recognize the presence of even and that is the feeling of left behind. In some senses even bordering on a sense of betrayal.

The key question is something on the lines of others getting to find things for themselves which are better than your lot.

Yes, jealousy has a role to play but my belief is  that it is not the prime mover. Depending on who you are the drivers are different.

A school teacher feels left behind seeing class after class graduate and leave in search of a better future whilst their future is to watch another batch graduate.

A broken-hearted lover instead of reminiscing the good times is actually thinking of how their special someone can find love and happiness without them or more painfully…. with someone else.

A colleague on the other hand might be coming from a point of insufficiency or self-doubt.

Regardless, the idea is not dig deeper into human psyche or to find the reasons behind this behaviour but to acknowledge.

I for one have gone through all or some of those feelings at some point or the other, that being said I have also been on the other side of being the bidee and must say that the ride on the other side ain’t that smooth either.

There are questions this side as well….
Will the folks at school/work remember me a few years on ?

Will the person I’m breaking up with find happiness  that they deserve? Now that I love someone else do I not like them?

My take…it is OK to be feel what you feel, very often we are too caught up with what we ought to be feeling. So if you are not happy someone got a job so be it. If you are not sad that you are breaking up so be it. If you are not whatever whatever so be it.

Moving on & getting left behind are perhaps two faces of the same coin.The key I would say is looking ahead.

So here’s to looking ahead.